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	<title>Help! A Bear Is Eating Me!</title>
	<link>http://helpabeariseatingme.com</link>
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		<title>The Seattle Bear!</title>
		<description><![CDATA[
Calling all space needlers!  This Saturday, June 19th 2010, I will present a special reprise infotainment performance of HELP! A BEAR IS EATING ME! to visitors of Seattle&#8217;s Crypticon!  If you&#8217;re in the area, please come join me at the merciless hour of eleven AM, when a very special guest and I will expose you [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://helpabeariseatingme.com/?p=80</link>
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		<title>Slashed Dreams and Bear Necessities</title>
		<description><![CDATA[
It was my pleasure to assist in the fact-checking on Garrett Cook&#8217;s article about the mildly bear-themed film SLASHED DREAMS.  Have you been wondering if you should rent this?  Did you fear you were missing out?  Let Garrett Cook &#8212; author of JIMMY PLUSH, BEAR DETECTIVE &#8212; put your mind at ease.
]]></description>
		<link>http://helpabeariseatingme.com/?p=78</link>
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		<title>New York City &#8230; home of Death Bear!</title>
		<description><![CDATA[
Death Bear is a superhero of the mourning process.  He comes silently, like cancer, to take away the stubborn little things that memories cling to.  Also, he&#8217;s a bear.  (Although, I heard a rumor that he is really Darth Vader, trying to atone for his past misdeeds, starting over in an awkward but sincere fashion.  [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://helpabeariseatingme.com/?p=76</link>
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		<title>How Long Could You Survive &#8230;</title>
		<description><![CDATA[
Unsure?  Take this surprisingly educational quiz and find out!  I was told &#8220;one hour, twenty minutes&#8221; — but then again, I am a professional.  Can you do better?  Maybe you can even make it to a hospital!
(Courtesy of The Oatmeal.)
]]></description>
		<link>http://helpabeariseatingme.com/?p=74</link>
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		<title>Color your way to freedom!</title>
		<description><![CDATA[
Everybody knows the holidays are the best time for arts &#38; crafts.  Why?  Because it&#8217;s shitty outside! Here in Portland it&#8217;s fucking freezing, and I know we&#8217;re not alone.
But whether you&#8217;re snowed in in Minneapolis, rained out in Seattle or swallowed by a Burmese python in Tampa, I have a way for you to fight [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://helpabeariseatingme.com/?p=73</link>
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		<title>New Dimensions In Famous:</title>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8230; from the &#8220;I&#8217;m so glad there&#8217;s a website for that&#8221; department:

&#160;
]]></description>
		<link>http://helpabeariseatingme.com/?p=72</link>
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		<title>Jimmy Plush, Bear Detective!</title>
		<description><![CDATA[
&#8220;In a city ridden with prostitute furries, cannibal cops and warehouse-sized mob bosses, I’ve got my work cut out for me. My name is Jimmy Plush. I’m a private detective. I’m also a teddy bear. 
It all started when the original Jimmy Plush entered my life, offering to take my gambling debts away if I [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://helpabeariseatingme.com/?p=70</link>
			</item>
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		<title>Famous Author Mykle Hansen</title>
		<description><![CDATA[
&#8230; hey, that&#8217;s me!  Yes, it&#8217;s true, my fame is now almost as large as my head.  Which, as this photo reveals, is almost as big as my ass.
What&#8217;s my secret?  The Famous Author Mykle Hansen website!  It&#8217;s fresh.  It&#8217;s far-reaching and comprehensive.  It contains organic sprouted grains and naked pictures of my cat, and [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://helpabeariseatingme.com/?p=68</link>
			</item>
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		<title>Bear, Eating Man</title>
		<description><![CDATA[
&#8220;I am a bear. Life is boring. Let me go eat some men &#8230;&#8221;
If you are the sort of person who likes websites full of funny, sad, adorable stories about bears and people — and we both know you are — then you ought to take a browse around Bear Parade, a lovely site dreamed [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://helpabeariseatingme.com/?p=62</link>
			</item>
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		<title>Alaskan Bears Reject Palin!</title>
		<description><![CDATA[
]]></description>
		<link>http://helpabeariseatingme.com/?p=67</link>
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