Almost dead!

November 14, 2007

in Help!,podcast @ 11:19 pm

Dear friends: the opportunity to use the word PENULTIMATE — go ahead, go look it up, I’ll wait here — comes far too rarely for my tastes. That’s why I’m pleased to provide you now with this, the PENULTIMATE CHAPTER of this increasingly epic podcast:


And dude, it is *so* PENULTIMATE! I mean, seriously! Not only is it PENULTIMATE, it’s also PEN-LONG-IMATE! That’s right, it’s the second longest chapter in the series. Long with goodness! It’s got action, it’s got suspense, and it’s got lots and lots of bears! It’s the kind of chapter that makes you turn skyward and exclaim “Thank you, Jesus, for chapters!”

In fact, if I had to pick a favorite chapter, I might pick this PENULTIMATE one — CHAPTER TWELVE!

Here is the format for the pods with eyes.

Here is the format for the pods lacking eyes.

And here is the feature you know you miss:

Q: Are you famous yet?

A: Totally! And yet, as with wealth and thinness, I feel could be famouser. If there’s anybody you haven’t pimped this podcast to, now would be a great time, as would any time in the past. The future, I suppose is okay too, but not as good as now.

Q: How’s the book coming?

A: Awesomely! We have master smartologist Brady Clark finishing up a fantastic book cover, we are e-proofing the i-galleys, and we are waiting for our writer friends to get back to us about blurbs! Once that’s all finished, you just push this button, and books rain from the sky!

Q: Have you gotten a blurb from Ted Nugent yet?

A: The Nuge works in mysterious ways. But we’re still trying.

Q: What are you going to do when the podcast is finished?

A: I hope to spend more time with my family, and perhaps teach a graduate course in podcasting at BYU. Also, I’ll probably do another one. And this podcast will eventually be available for purchase on CD, for persons who have lost their hands to bears, and cannot operate computers. And also for stupid people with too much money.


  1. Love the book so far. Looking forward to hearing both this, the PENULTIMATE chapter, along with the final chapter (which would be the ULTIMATE chapter, no?).

    Just thought you might like to know that the links are broken, though. They point to instead of like they should.

    comment by Ben — November 20, 2007 @ 12:12 am

  2. Good christ! Your’re right! What kind of two-bit operation am I running here?

    Thanks for the tip. I’ll get someone fired for that right away.

    And yes, the next chapter is the ULTIMATE chapter. But I prefer to call it: CHAPTER OMEGA!

    comment by admin — November 20, 2007 @ 12:24 am

  3. Congrats on a great podcast. I’ve eagerly listened to every minute.

    I was very surprised a couple of days ago to hear Marvin’s voice and delivery coming out of my radio. I’m assuming you haven’t made a Budget Rent-A-Car commercial using Marvin, is that right? Because SOMEBODY has listened closely to “Help! A Bear Is Eating Me” and is now set to make a good living using that amazing voice.

    I wish I could send you a copy of the ad, but I looked around and didn’t see any way to do that.

    comment by Brian — November 20, 2007 @ 8:26 am

  4. Hey, thanks! Alas, I have made no such commercial. I did have a brief stint as a talking taco on cable TV, but it didn’t work out.

    I want to get into voice work — radio ads, animated features, sock puppets, that kind of thing. But I might need to sharpen up my acting skills a bit. I’m happy with this podcast but I also could have done better with a director’s help, and with a bit more time and effort. Next podcast I’m going to raise the bar.

    comment by admin — November 20, 2007 @ 10:04 am

  5. Oh man. Too many bears in my head. I read that as “next podcast I’m going to raise the bear.”

    comment by yvonne — December 19, 2007 @ 11:58 pm

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